Sunday, April 16, 2006
An Unwanted Journey: Day 0143 - Surviving
I can't believe how difficult this week has been! The loss of blood has been the single biggest setback I've encountered. I understand gastric ulcers are not uncommon when one has compromised the immune system through radiation and chemotherapy and then traumatized it with surgery. But I felt so good after surgery that the complication really threw me completely out of kilter.
When I first arrived home after surgery, I was walking around the block. Right now, I can barely walk to the washroom. That, too, is something that is difficult to handle. Urinating is almost more difficult than bowel movements, mainly because of the bearing down that I have to do to accomplish the task. Everything right now zaps my energy and leaves me feeling on the verge of passing out. I am definitely not used to this!
But things will get better. My haemoglobin levels fell dramatically as I was vomiting blood, but they remained steady enough for my surgeon to give me approval to be released again last Wednesday. Because I am not getting my blood work done daily anymore, I can't tell how well they are rebounding except for the colour in my face and my daily energy levels. It feels like things are improving, but I still don't want to eat or move about much.
When I arrived home, I discovered that the power adapter on my notebook computer had died. It will be another couple days before a replacement arrives. Not that it matters much. Since my readmittance to hospital and second discharge, the last thing I want to do is look at the computer. It just takes far too much energy.
Thanks to all the continuing well wishers. I will become more coherent and capable as I recover, but it will take more time than I ever would have anticipated with this ulcer complication.
My wife and children have been attending to my needs. A very good friend has made regular (and short) visits to my bedside and then to my home to offer words of encouragement. Thanks, John.
I am obviously losing weight, so don't be too surprised if you eventually see someone a little less than you would otherwise recognize. This might be a good thing!
Anyway, doing this has tired me out completely. I'll write again when I can.