I was listening to Sheila Rodgers doing an interview with Murray McLaughlin, who mentioned how his quadruple bypass surgery helped his marriage. During the interview, Murray mentioned that men have this "room" inside where they wonder whether their spouse loves them as unequivocally as their mother did. When he was trying to negotiate the stairs of his home after his surgery, and struggling like an invalid 90-year-old, his wife cared for him in exactly the unconditional, loving way that his mother might have done.
It occurred to me that his description of how surgery strengthened his marriage was indicative of my own experience. That "room" inside, hidden from view and almost never revealed, is no longer a secret place. My wife, just like Murray's, demonstrated love and concern for me when I was almost invalid in exactly the way my mother might have done.
Not every man is so fortunate. Not every man gets to open that "room" to the daylight, let the sun stream through, open the windows, and do the spring cleaning of the cobwebs we so desperately need. There's yet another unexpected blessing of this thing called cancer.
2 comments:
I also heard this interview Don and immediately thought of you. It's an interesting "window" on the male brain that I'm sure most men don't want to explore. You are truly a lucky man to have such a wife. I don't need to tell you that but I thought I'd comment anyway. Keep your chin up!
Hi, Lisa. Good to hear from you again!
I'm not sure if I'll explore that part of my brain any more - I just might find that nothing much is happening there...maybe the lights aren't even on!
Take care.
Don
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