Thursday, October 18, 2007

An Unwanted Journey: Day 0693 - One Week In, One Week Away

I'm still one week away from my first consultation with my family physician to review my blood tests, the first meeting after my second release from the regional cancer centre. I know. It's getting a little complicated talking about firsts, seconds, follow ups, and what are increasingly standard medical precautions.

That's very good news. Even with occasional hard-to-take evenings, concerns about my health are receding. I'm losing weight and getting my BMI values back closer to where they should be. Cancer, after all, isn't the only health issue I should be considering. But I'm feeling full of energy and vitality these days. In other words, my health is good.

So, even after one week into my job transition status, and one week away from my consultation with my doctor, I'm feeling confident about everything. The optimism of the first few hours after my termination notice owing to downsizing in the company where I was employed has continued unabated. Sure, I've had some sleepless nights, but it's not from worry so much as excitement about prospects, about the search, about evaluating where I want to go next, about how my social capital will play out in the next few weeks or so, about life in general.

I really don't know if this is normal or not. It's been so long since I've done an active job search that I'm not sure whether my optimism is warranted. But hey, even if it isn't, at least I'm enjoying the ride. The confidence has to make a difference as I get closer to interview situations.

But there's another possibility. Maybe it's experience and the equanimity of my truly unwanted journey coming into play. Once you've stared cancer in the face and survived the encounter, other set backs seem trivial in comparison.

Other people - friends, family, and colleagues - are reflecting the same confidence I feel. That helps too.

In fact, another of the life lessons I've learned is playing out in this new situation; namely, what you put out there comes right back at you. As I wrote to a friend today, life's ups and downs can be spun just like anything else. It's funny actually. I choose to spin my current situation in a very positive light, and surprise, surprise, that's exactly how others are spinning it back.

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